"Mira, aren't you checking social media too much?"
Sora said this when Mira looked at her phone for the third time.
Mira looked slightly surprised. "Am I?"
Leo looked up from his book. "Checking reactions to your post?"
Mira nodded. She had posted a drawing this morning.
"No matter how many times you check, the number of likes won't change," Sora said gently.
"But," Mira said quietly, "no one has reacted yet."
Leo asked with interest, "Does no reaction make you anxious?"
"Yes. I wonder if my drawing is boring."
Sora wrote in her notebook. "Dependency on external validation"
"External validation?" Mira asked.
"Determining your own worth by others' evaluations," Sora explained. "It's also related to approval seeking."
Leo added, "In psychology, there are two sources of self-worth. Internal and external."
"What's internal?"
"Your own standards. 'This is a good piece,' you judge for yourself."
"And external?"
"Others' evaluations. Likes, comments, praise, and so on."
Mira pondered. "Am I dependent on external validation?"
Sora said quietly, "The degree of dependency varies by person. But relying only on external validation can be dangerous."
"How so?"
"When you don't get validation, your self-worth collapses," Leo answered. "And since you can't control others' reactions, you're constantly anxious."
Mira put down her phone. "True. I'm always checking."
Sora asked, "Mira, why do you draw?"
"Huh?"
"To be recognized by someone? Or because you enjoy drawing itself?"
Mira thought for a moment. "Both... I guess. But lately, I've only been worrying about reactions."
"That's the problem," Leo said. "The motivation for your activity has shifted to external rewards."
"External rewards?"
"Likes and praise. When you start acting to obtain those, intrinsic motivation weakens."
Sora added explanation. "In other words, instead of drawing because it's purely enjoyable, you're drawing because you'll be evaluated."
Mira sighed. "That might be true. Lately, drawing has become less fun."
"A typical pattern," Leo nodded. "When you depend on external validation, the joy of the activity itself is lost."
Sora said gently, "But approval seeking itself isn't bad. Humans are social creatures."
"However, balance is important," Leo continued. "Use external evaluation as reference, but don't let it determine your self-worth."
Mira asked, "How can I achieve balance?"
Sora suggested, "First, have time to create works without worrying about evaluation."
"Not post them?"
"You can post them. But reduce how often you check reactions. Like only once a day."
Leo added, "And clarify your own evaluation standards. Be able to say 'I like this part of this drawing.'"
Mira looked at the notebook. "Not what others think, but what I think."
"Yes," Sora nodded. "Others' evaluations are just reference information. You make the final judgment."
Leo closed his book. "Interestingly, worrying too much about external evaluation can actually lower your evaluation."
"Why?" Mira was surprised.
"Because trying to match others' preferences makes you lose yourself. When uniqueness is lost, the work's appeal decreases too."
Sora smiled. "So valuing your internal standards ultimately leads to good evaluation as well."
Mira turned off her phone notifications. "From today, I'll check only once a day."
"Good decision," Leo acknowledged.
"And," Mira said, "I'll draw what I want to draw."
Sora nodded. "That's most important."
Soft light streamed through the library window. Others' evaluations change like waves. But your own worth can be decided by yourself.
"Thank you," Mira smiled. "I feel a bit lighter."
The reason for depending on external validation might be a lack of internal confidence. But that confidence can be cultivated gradually. Today was the first step.