Short Story ◉ Philosophy

How Far Is Friendship Real?

Haru and Simon debate the essence of friendship. Are conditional relationships true friendship?

  • #friendship
  • #authenticity
  • #conditional relationships
  • #trust

"What is a friend?"

Haru asked suddenly. After school in the library, notebooks spread out with Simon.

"That's sudden," Simon looked up from the book.

"Lately I've been thinking. Is this relationship real?"

"Between us?"

"Yeah. Simon is kind and easy to talk to. But what if I completely changed?"

"Changed?"

"Like personality, hobbies. If I became a totally different person, would you still be my friend?"

Simon pondered. "That's a difficult question."

Noa called out from a nearby sofa. "You're questioning the conditional nature of friendship."

"Conditional?" Haru turned around.

"Friendship has reasons. Common interests, values, experiences..."

"So it ends when the conditions disappear?"

Simon answered. "Aristotle divided friendship into three types. Friendship of pleasure, friendship of utility, friendship of virtue."

"What's the difference?"

"Friendship of pleasure is because being together is fun. Friendship of utility is because we're mutually useful. Friendship of virtue is because we respect each other's character itself."

"So only friendship of virtue is real?"

Noa supplemented. "Aristotle thought so. But that's not the only view."

Haru was confused. "Which are we?"

"Probably a mixture," Simon said. "Fun to be together, helping each other study, and respecting each other."

"If it's mixed, is it impure?"

"No," Noa smiled. "Rather, it's natural. Human relationships are complex."

Haru thought. "But what if I became useless? No longer fun?"

"You'd still be you," Simon said seriously.

"But the reasons for friendship would disappear."

"Reasons might change. But the relationship continues."

Noa showed another perspective. "It's questionable whether friendship has a 'real' versus 'fake' distinction."

"What do you mean?"

"All friendship is conditional to some degree. Completely unconditional relationships are difficult even between parent and child."

"So real friendship doesn't exist?"

"Depends on definition," Simon said. "If 'unconditional' is the standard, it barely exists. But if 'mutual trust and respect' is the standard, it exists."

Haru felt a bit relieved. "So we're friends?"

"Of course."

"But it might end someday."

"Does that make you sad?" Noa asked.

"...Yes."

"That sadness shows the value of the relationship."

Simon nodded. "German philosopher Scheler said friendship aims for eternity but is actually finite."

"Aims for eternity?"

"When we form friendships, we assume 'forever.' But situations actually change."

"Isn't that contradictory?"

"A human contradiction," Noa said. "The gap between ideal and reality."

Haru looked outside the window. Sunset coloring the school building.

"So what should we do?"

"Treasure the now," Simon answered. "While accepting future uncertainty."

"Here and now."

"Yes. The realness of friendship isn't in future guarantees, but in present sincerity."

Noa said quietly. "Rather than seeking perfect friendship, nurture imperfect friendship."

"Imperfect is okay?"

"Because it's imperfect, effort has meaning."

Simon closed the book. "I consider you a friend. Now, certainly."

"Now," Haru repeated. "Maybe that's enough."

"It's enough," Noa smiled.

The library lights turned on. Even if friendship's boundaries are vague, its warmth is certain.