"I made the same mistake again."
Kaito hit his own head. In the club room after school, Hiyori looked worried.
"What kind of mistake?" Hiyori asked gently.
"I was late for an appointment. Again," Kaito laughed self-deprecatingly. "I'm really terrible."
Sora entered the room. "What's terrible?"
"Everything," Kaito said. "Can't keep time, forget promises, everything."
Hiyori said quietly, "That might be cognitive distortion."
"Distortion?" Kaito looked up.
"Overgeneralization," Hiyori explained. "Drawing the conclusion 'everything is terrible' from one failure."
Sora opened her notebook. "One failure is being expanded to everything."
"But I really am terrible," Kaito said stubbornly. "There's lots of evidence."
Hiyori asked, "Has anything gone well recently?"
Kaito pondered. "...I listened to a friend's problem yesterday, I guess."
"That's wonderful."
"But that's just normal..." Kaito started to say.
Sora interrupted. "Wait. Successes are 'normal' but failures are 'evidence'?"
Kaito fell silent.
Hiyori continued, "The self-loathing loop is created this way. Ignoring good things, collecting only bad ones."
"Confirmation bias," Sora said. "Picking up only information that reinforces the belief 'I'm terrible.'"
Kaito said weakly, "But if I'm not strict with myself, I can't grow."
"Self-criticism and self-loathing are different," Hiyori explained. "Constructive criticism promotes growth, but destructive self-loathing paralyzes you."
Sora gave an example. "The difference between 'I'll be careful next time' and 'I'm terrible.'"
"The former is future-oriented, the latter is trapped in the past," Hiyori supplemented.
Kaito sighed. "So what should I do?"
Hiyori said gently, "First, try replacing words you direct at yourself with words you'd direct at a friend."
"What do you mean?"
"If a friend made the same mistake, would you say 'you're completely terrible'?"
Kaito shook his head. "I wouldn't. I'd say something like 'it happens to everyone.'"
"Then why do you use harsh words for yourself?"
Kaito realized. "...Because it's me?"
Sora supplemented, "We apply stricter standards to ourselves than to others."
Hiyori nodded. "Self-compassion is important."
"Does that mean being lenient with myself?" Kaito showed doubt.
"No. It means making realistic and fair evaluations," Hiyori answered. "Applying balanced evaluations to yourself like you would to a friend."
Sora wrote in her notebook. "Self-loathing loop: Failure → Self-criticism → Loss of confidence → Further failure."
"Exactly," Hiyori acknowledged. "To break this loop, you need to change the self-criticism step."
Kaito asked seriously, "Specifically how?"
"Acknowledge failure while separating it from self-worth," Hiyori explained. "The fact 'I was late' and the evaluation 'I'm a terrible person' are separate things."
Sora added, "Don't confuse behavioral failure with personality denial."
Kaito nodded slowly. "It's difficult, but I'll try."
Hiyori smiled. "It's difficult at first. But you can change gradually."
"When you feel self-loathing, pause and think," Sora suggested. "'Is this fact, or distorted thinking?'"
Kaito took a deep breath. "Being kind to myself isn't escape."
"It's courage actually," Hiyori said. "Self-loathing is, in a way, easier."
"Easier?" Kaito was surprised.
"Because it becomes a reason not to change," Sora understood. "'I'm terrible anyway' lets you give up."
Hiyori nodded. "Escaping self-loathing is the first step to change."
Sunset illuminated the club room. Kaito's expression brightened a little.
It would take time to completely escape the loop. But realizing its existence was already the beginning of change.